Old College Try: an Exciting New Series by the Creator of "Geneva Convention."

I was meandering through the art supply section of the university bookstore (now called the "Duck Store"--bookstores are so 20th century) yesterday in search of something to spruce up a long papery swatch of birch bark I peeled off a tree after lunch when I overheard the following conversation.

[Two clerks, one male, one female, stand idly around while some non-offensive, bland, male voice sings about love or something over the store speakers.]

Female clerk: Oh my god. I really really hate this kind of music.
Male clerk: What do you mean?
FC: You know, this, whaddayacallit, um...singer-songwriter music. You know, a guy singing with a guitar. I can't stand this. It's so sincere.
MC: Mmhm. Huh.
FC: I mean, Jesus Christ, it is so sincere! I mean, how pretentious can you get? This type of music is soooo pretentious!

I wanted to point out to the FC that while the music may be pretentious, it would be extremely difficult to tell. I mean, after all, how do we know if he's pretending? And if we were to judge that he was pretending to be something, how would we do this? By listening to the lyrics? FC obviously was not listening to the lyrics, as she was busy drowning them out with her shrill anti-sincerity screed. Or maybe she just doesn't like guitars. Or male voices. One thing is for certain, though. Sincerity is fucking played out, man. Game over. [Insert mental image of Bill Paxton here.]