"I am an idealistic, naive, passionate, truth-seeking, spiritually motivated artist, unschooled in the science of law and finance." --Wesley Snipes

Friday, January 25, 2008

new collaborative "poem" by Sandra Simonds & Anthony Robinson


& Anthony Robinson

Being a poet makes you an asshole
All poets are jerks
i also just got rejected from a prize

Being an asshole clears your poety sinuses,
gives clarity at congested parties in the backroom revels at AWP

AWP is like the bowels of a donkey
man i'm so depressed about my work

the donkey's bowels are more attractive
to me than the finest bone china
& maybe someone will offer to publish
my paperback tome of incantatory gusto

i fucking hate the poetry world
the world of poetry opens its doors. come in! come in!
have a drink! suck my dick!

can we submit this under both our names

keep going--poetry won't leave you behind.
the poetry world is full of creeps
( i am full of RAGE against all poets great and small)

who creepeth on the ground and creepeth
into bed with lithe undergrads with Plath complexes
& still pimply complexions

can I write them and title this poem this is for you assholes?
this poem is for YOU, assholes
poets younger than you rejecting your ass
it is for all of our assholes

i think most poets sleep with donkeys to get ahead
i am a bitter evil poet
to get ahead give some head

or should I title the submission..publish this you bastards
be sure to include the cackles.
and a few LOLs for good measure

can i really submit this
of course you can

but now my rage has died down
and i dont care about jubilat
i never did
you would have a lot less rage if you didn't submit to journals

this whole chat IS A POEM
no fucking shit, ese. vatos locos forever!
check it: clipper poems here: http://anti-poetry.com/
now i have to go chat with my tweedly boss. .


Steven D. Schroeder said...

Just today I was talking with a poet and we made her non-poet co-worker laugh with our catty poetry insults.

What's a clipper poem?

Tony R said...

Hi Steve,

"Clipper" is Sand's affectionate nickname for me.

Anonymous said...

I did a google for "AWP assholes" -- I figured there had to be something good.

Nobody could be "talking with a poet," however--they're extinct, like the dodo. Better to use "creative writer."